Choose your own interactive fiction
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You line up behind a small, turtle-like alien who seems to ignore you, and you grab a tray. You are leaning over, trying to peer down the line at all the food on offering, and wondering if any of it will kill you, when the turtle turns around.
"Hey, pal. You mind? You're kinda crowding me."
"Sorry," you say. "I'm brand new here. Is this stuff good?"
"Good? No. Free? Yes." He looks you up and down. "You're a human, ain't ya? Haven't seen one of you in a real long time. Not since they fed the Central Beast last--You know, never mind about that. What are you doing here, friend?"
You tell him what Gilbert told you, even though it doesn't mean much to you.
The turtle's eyes grow wide. "A Universal Donor, no kidding? Wow, that's amazing. You're going to be a big help around here. You met Fisch yet?"
"Uh...I don't think so?"
"He'll do your orientation."
"Oh, I'm supposed to be going to see him now. Got side tracked by the cafeteria."
The turtle shakes his head. "No, no, don't make him wait. You go in with an empty stomach if you have to, because if you're late he'll rip out your guts anyway. Not literally. That's what the Central Beast does to--Never mind about that."
The turtle grabs a bright red object from the buffet and puts it on his tray. "What's that?" you ask.
"A banana, of course. Why, what do they look like where you're from?"
So space bananas really are red. That clears things up. Now you know for sure you need to go through the red door.
You just need to find it first...
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